Knowing how to be a good partner isn’t always intuitive. Especially for men who grew up not learning about relationships. I love the way women do things. Men don’t tend to sit around and keep talking about how to be a great boyfriend. That’s sad.
We’d like to think that being a good husband or boyfriend comes naturally, but for most of us, that’s not the case.
For men who want to learn how to be better boyfriends, it’s important to realize that it’s your job to take the first steps toward becoming the man your partner believes is worthy of your relationship and marriage.
It’s no secret that healthy relationships take effort. One important thing to remember is that the work needs to be completed, or at least in progress, before you can feel satisfied with your partner or relationship.
If you want to treat your partner right and make her fall even deeper in love with you, try to give her your best self every day.
Here are 10 little habits that will make you a better boyfriend than 98% of men.
1. Take responsibility for your role in things.
Traditionally, women want a man who respects them and gives them attention. why? Because many women are emotional creatures and make decisions based on how you make them feel.
On the contrary, most men are taught to make decisions based on logic. Only you know why you don’t appear in front of her.
It seems like the path you’ve been on isn’t working anymore, so it’s time to take a new path. From now on, accept your responsibility.
Don’t blame your partner or play the victim, show your 100% self. Partners often blame each other for their shortcomings. This will cause the discussion to go round and round.
have been to? It happens because no one has ownership!
Understanding that you are separate is important, even in a relationship. Also, if your partner is unhappy about something, you can respect the fact that they were honest with you and take responsibility for what you did wrong and what you could do better.
Keep this mentality to stay in your zone. do not worry! It does not bring hostility or blame into the relationship.
2. Stay with her.
Women want to feel heard and that men understand and support them. The biggest step is to take a moment and listen to her. Be 100 percent present when she’s talking to you. Put down your phone, stop watching sports, be there for her.
You may be thinking, “But she talks all the time…”
If you start getting into the habit of listening to her and being fully present when she speaks, she will stop approaching you on the same topic. why? Because she feels that her needs are being met and that she is being heard.
This will make her feel safe and satisfied with the relationship. Think about what you are offering her. Are you communicating in a positive, productive, and healthy way?
3. Tell her how much you appreciate her.
Before you go to bed, talk about positive things that happened that day and things you’re grateful for. Do this for about 10 minutes and then go to bed.
When you wake up in the morning, don’t say anything to your partner for the first 15 minutes of the day. All you need to do is hold each other for 15 minutes. If she continues this activity for 3-4 weeks, she will feel a renewed intimacy with her partner and a dramatic change in the relationship.
It can help you remove your emotional attachment to negative situations and help you strive to become a better person.
Many women want a man who makes them feel safe, secure (which also means faithful), happy, honored, listened to, beautiful, and independent.
It’s not that hard to be a better boyfriend if you can understand what’s behind your partner’s needs.
If you don’t know what or how she wants to hear it, ask her.
4. Invest in your growth.
Many men think that once they find the right woman for them, all their suffering will go away. They wonder why the woman they love is not enough.
This usually stems from childhood.
It’s common for a man who grew up in a home where love was not shown much (or at all) to have the spark go out in his heart once he begins to feel loved and secure.
These men are so caught up in the thrill and pursuit of a new relationship that they embrace passionately when a woman starts to open up and share her love for you.
If you think this applies to you, you may have been emotionally wired to resist love as a child. This is something you have unconsciously adapted to.
Another trend common to men is parents’ relationship with each other. If a child grows up in a household where their mother and father often fight, they are likely to reproduce the same behavior as adults in their relationships. It seems like a normal thing for them.
It can lead to many fights and can develop into emotional, verbal, or physical abuse.
In order to be a better boyfriend or husband, you should strive to be happy and healthy.
When you tackle the root of the problem and challenge yourself to overcome it, you can move towards self-development.
5. Admit your flaws.
You can’t keep blaming your partner. If the problem is caused by you, you must take responsibility.
Everyone has flaws.Only actions can be controlled you responsible for.
If you irritate or upset your partner, you need to make appropriate changes.
Are you always late? Perhaps you expect her to cook every night even though you both work all day. What are the recurring problems?
If you don’t know, ask!
Maybe you’re stuck in an unhealthy relationship and haven’t made the changes you need to be happy. When you ignore issues that you can control, you are giving away your power by blaming others for their shortcomings.
You can never control your partner’s behavior, but you can set a positive example. If one partner doesn’t show up, the other can leave.
6. Create healthy boundaries.
When you are a positive example of the man you want to be, your partner will also receive guidelines for setting healthy boundaries.
Boundaries can feel a little scary at first.
Do you know when you were little and you did something wrong and got in trouble? There’s a brief moment of fear when you realize you’ve failed. You have crossed the line.
This should become a reference point in the relationship.
The decisions you make are based on you and your partner. You can’t stay out with your friends until 5 a.m. if your partner doesn’t like it. If you do, you will lose respect and break boundaries.
Treat your partner’s boundaries with respect, just as you would want your partner to treat yours.
Set the tone each day by discussing your desires and values in your relationship and living accordingly.
7. Know your role in the relationship.
Taking on your own relationship role is very important, especially if you want to know how to be a better husband or boyfriend.
Regardless of how it is portrayed in movies and popular television, your relationship role does not come from your ego.
You don’t have to shout to be heard, raise your tone because you’re more dominant than your partner, or tell women what to do or how to act because you’re a man.
All of this is a lack of respect and if you find yourself doing this, you must stop doing it. Otherwise you will never be happy.
Relationships require balance. But that doesn’t mean men have to be traditional “manly men” and women have to be the submissive stereotype.
Men and women share roles to develop and provide, there must be balance in the relationship. You must allow yourself to be strong and soft for your woman.
Your role in a relationship is not to be dominant, but to know where you stand and where you best show up. If a disagreement arises, give her a chance to speak and always remember to speak from her heart.
Before you answer, ask yourself, “Is this coming from my heart or from my ego?”
By doing so, you can spend more time with her and show her that you are setting positive boundaries.
8. We will continue to be dedicated to our partners and be trusted.
There’s nothing better than a man taking action! This is one of the things a woman pays the most attention to and can ultimately destroy a relationship.
People gain true trust by keeping their word and then taking action. This is where a woman’s trust and sense of security are built.
She wants to know that you are trustworthy and that she can rely on you. You show her that through your means as a man of keeping her promises. Stay away from temptations that can cause a rift in your relationship.
Find new ways to discover what brings you thrills with your partner.
Do you want to be a better boyfriend? Quit bad habits and confidently show him that he is 100% faithful. You both deserve this from each other.
9. Satisfy her needs and desires
Physical relationships are important, but emotional connections are also important. Find something that interests you both. What does your partner love?
Learn about them so you can stimulate her mind and talk about the things she likes. Find out what she values in her life. Being able to talk about things you both like can create an intellectual connection and potentially increase physical intimacy.
When women are asked what they find attractive in men, their answers may surprise you. They are often not what men expect.
One thing in common? You have to be there for her.
For many women, the most attractive thing is when a man can connect with them in a way that makes them emotionally attracted to him.
This means being in tune with yourself, being honest and open, and sharing parts of yourself with her.
Photo: AshTproductions via Shutterstock
10. Take care of yourself by respecting your own well-being and needs.
What does it take to have a happy relationship? It could be financial freedom, graduation, finding the perfect job, or moving on from past behavior.
There’s nothing better than someone who has a positive outlook on life.
This is a very valuable (and rare!) quality today. If you are a man with a positive outlook on life, you will not only be more attractive to women, but you will also be more attractive to yourself.
Self-love is not something we are taught growing up, but it is an important principle not only in relationships but in everything in life. Being able to love yourself more than anything else will set the tone for all your relationships.
Apollonia Ponti I’m a dating and relationship expert and certified coach who works with men and women to get exactly what they want from their love lives.
This article was originally published at: Apollonia Ponti. Reprinted with permission from the author.