Often people romanticize the word “soulmate”. Maybe it’s because in romantic comedies and romance novels, we’re told that a soulmate is the true love of your life. In other words, you have that “soul connection” that romanticizes the process of finding that one person who is crazy about you.
Ironically, finding your soulmate isn’t actually about those lovey-dovey feelings. Rather, they are all trivial things that have nothing to do with love.
Here are 10 unromantic signs that a man might be your soulmate.
1. He is frighteningly honest.
Your soulmate will be your biggest critic. He will be the person who will make you realize that you made a wrong decision or did something that could ruin your life.
However, he is not afraid to be honest instead of hiding the truth from you. It’s simply because he really cares and wants the best for you. His brutal honesty is refreshing and pushes you in the right direction.
2. He pushes you to your limits.
A soulmate inspires you to dream and achieve your goals. God knows your true potential and will help you achieve your wildest dreams, no matter how impossible they may seem.
When you doubt yourself, God is the one who restores your faith. He won’t always be your shoulder to cry on. He won’t save you from drowning, but he will teach you how to swim.
3. He’s not the person you like.
My heart doesn’t beat faster or I get butterflies in my stomach when I see him. Instead, you will feel calm inside. Meeting your soulmate is not the same as meeting the person you love. Simply because I feel so comfortable with him.
I find that I can be myself when I’m around him, and he makes me feel good about who I really am.
4. He doesn’t put labels on your relationship.
You don’t know the label for your relationship with him—and you’re totally fine with that. As long as you enjoy each other’s company, that’s enough.
You and he both understand that labels don’t matter because you’re both adults. They both want to take things slowly because they feel that friendship is too important to label and break.
5. He helps you understand your shortcomings.
Looking at him is like looking at yourself. Being with him, he knows his strengths and weaknesses. He improves your self-awareness. He helps me understand that my flaws are a part of who I am, but that they are not bad.
A soulmate is someone who makes you realize that you need to be a better version of yourself. But you also know that he accepts you as you are and will never ask you to change.
6. He is busy building his life.
Your soulmate doesn’t have to be with you 24/7 just because they have their own personal lives. Therefore, in any relationship, both partners must have their own lives and independence from each other.
He inspires you to achieve your goals and you admit that he dreams just as big as you. But despite the fact that he is busy, you always find time to keep up with each other and continue to participate in each other’s lives.
7. He encourages deep thinking.
A soulmate is someone who wants to know and understand your thoughts, ideas, fears, and anxieties. He doesn’t want to talk about the weather outside. He wants a real connection with you!
He engages you in deep conversations. He makes you think about the purpose of life and gives meaning to your life.
8. He makes you “lose” the argument.
There is always a reason behind his opinion and just because his argument makes sense, you realize you need to lower your ego. Therefore, always seek his opinion before making any important decisions.
Also, God respects your unique principles and values and will not force you to change your basic moral values. God knows when to intervene in your life to help you see the big picture.
9. He helps you face your fears.
Your soulmate will help you find the courage to leave your comfort zone. He will make you experience new things and have endless adventures to expand your horizons. He becomes your partner in crime as you explore the world.
He makes you realize that you don’t just belong in one place and that you should live your life to the fullest.
10. I can’t make him stay.
Deep down, you know that no matter how much you try to change him or yourself, you can’t make him stay. You accept that soulmates don’t need to be together to truly connect.
It would be great if he stays, but if he doesn’t we’ll be ready. Having him in your life is a blessing and he opens you up to truly love someone.
Rai Normega His byline is an author featured in Thought Catalog, Elite Daily, Magdalene, Huffington Post, The Jakarta Post, and more.
This article was originally published at: all female stems. Reprinted with permission from the author.