- When dating someone new, you probably want to know if they like you as much as you like them.
- After a few dates, my therapist said I should trust my intuition and look for promising patterns.
- Things like check-in rituals and insightful questions can indicate mutual interest.
If you’ve ever been so smitten by a new love interest, you’ve felt the urge to analyze their every move and decipher their hidden meanings to see if they love you the same way. It may happen.
But everyone shows their romantic feelings in different ways. Therapist Alphonso Ferguson says that while some people prefer to be open about their feelings, others are too anxious to express their feelings and show interest primarily through their actions.
Ferguson said you shouldn’t read too much into your interactions with new partners, telling Business Insider, “Trust your instincts as much as you can.” However, if you’re still feeling anxious, it’s because you’ve never felt that way before or you have a serious brainworm infection. “Red Flag” related TikTok video — Ferguson said there are some signs to look out for.
“These are not things you see on a first date or a first encounter,” Ferguson said. But if you notice that this person does these things consistently, he said, that means your relationship is mutual.
they start planning
According to Ferguson, if your lover is really interested in you, they’ll want to see you again and will let you know.
This could be when you’re currently on a date and it seems like you’re asking for another date, or you text or call right after and say, “Hey, what’s your schedule going to be next week? I’d love to see you again soon.” ” (Mr. Ferguson) said.
He said starting a plan could be a sign of intent. build intimacy and trust For couples, regardless of what relationship stage they are currently in, BI previously reported.
Works around your schedule even when you’re busy
If your new boo doesn’t reach out to make plans, it may seem like they don’t like you as much as you like them. But don’t assume that, Ferguson said.
For some he is fear of rejection You may avoid reaching out first in the early stages of a relationship. And for people in same-sex relationships, it can be difficult to gauge expectations about who will ask someone out on a date in the early stages of a relationship, Ferguson told BI. (He regularly counsels LGBTQ+ clients, who say the norms of straight dating can make navigating the situation even more confusing.)
But luckily, there’s another easy way to gauge if your partner is interested in you. That requires a little courage on your part. Ferguson says that if you first indicate that you’d like to connect in person or over the phone, they’ll find a way to make that happen.
Even if someone’s life is already full of work, friends and family responsibilities, they will make space for you if you want to make a connection, Ferguson said.
There is a check-in ritual
After going on several dates, a modest ceremony Ferguson said having a significant other could also be a sign of a promising relationship.
According to Ferguson, if you and your honey have developed a habit of sending each other good morning and good night messages, scheduling weekly FaceTime calls, and exchanging silly memes, it’s because they’re yours. This is proof that they are passionate about their relationship.
He said consistent check-ins, even short text- or image-based check-ins, show people they’re thinking about you and will reach out to you.
they ask insightful questions
If someone wants to connect with you on a deeper level, they’ll also ask about your preferences, opinions, important relationships, etc., says Ferguson.
“The question should go beyond ‘What are you doing?'” I’m trying to get to know you better” he told BI.
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