Trusting your partner through the ups and downs in the pursuit of mutual happiness is essential to understanding how to grow in a long-lasting relationship.
Here are five signature conversations that happily married couples have, according to the experts at YourTango.
1. Conversation about each other’s health
In a loving relationship, focus on you and your partner’s daily well-being. therefore, empathize with difficult situations And celebrating successes always includes both spouses’ perspectives.
This is the opposite of asking, “Are you okay?” This shows that you’re not interested in hearing how your partner feels. Saying, “Honey, I know _______ is a difficult situation for you and I’m here to help,” sends a message of dedicated support and love.
— susan allanPresident and Representative Director of Marriage Forum Co., Ltd.
Photo: 9nong (via Shutterstock)
2. Always “Tell me more” conversations
Happy married couples are interested in each other. They want to know what their partner enjoys, why they like it, who they like, and how they see the world.
Fortunately, married couples remain focused on others and attuned to their partner’s growth throughout their lives. Conversations usually include the phrase “Tell me more.”
This phrase is used by partners who are sensitive, proactive, and prioritize their partner over household chores, friends, children, and other interests, conveying a message of respect, value, and concern, and contributing to their partner’s well-being.
The two of us Attributing one’s happiness to one’s spouse It is committed.
— leta walkerPh.D. Relationship Coach
3. Conversations about tackling difficult things
We have been married for a long time and have had many ups and downs. We talk about how lucky we are to have tackled the hard things, held on to the good things, and still love what we have together.
— Suzanne GeimerSpecial Angel Co., Ltd. Representative Director and President
4. Conversations about being open to the evolution of the relationship
Happily married couples tend to trust each other, commit to building a life together, and show love and appreciation for each other.
Many successful couples Regular conversations expressing gratitude The other is while remaining open to changing what isn’t working.
For example, asking what someone can do differently to meet your spouse’s needs and desires will convey consideration, respect, and openness to evolve and grow together.
— Dr. Courtney Warren, Certified clinical psychologist
5. Conversations about each other’s feelings
Our partner might say, “I’m feeling a little down today,” and we quickly respond, “Oh, don’t be down. I have a great weekend planned.”
Unintentionally, we have ignored our partner’s feelings, making them feel unsafe to share on this level in the future.
— mary morrisseyinternational speaker and bestselling author
No matter what kind of conversation you encounter in a long-term relationship, being emotionally vulnerable, the skills to communicate effectively, actively listen, and empathize never come in handy. By being open to the evolving nature of the relationship and at the same time becoming guides who share responsibility for guiding each other, we can find freedom and support.
Long-lasting relationships go through cycles. We can and do need help, but if we act equally in all relationships, there will always be a balance.
Will Curtis is a writer and editor at YourTango. He was featured on his Good Men Project and has been teaching English abroad for 10 years.