A boyfriend’s decision to leave his girlfriend behind and go on a solo trip on his 40th birthday has garnered overwhelming support online.
On Reddit’s popular confessional forum, Am I an idiot?The 39-year-old admitted that the main reason he ditched his girlfriend and travelled alone was because he couldn’t afford to have her accompany him.
He explained that he and his partner, 33, only started dating three months ago, but that his desire to take an extended break from work for himself had been brewing for some time.
“I’ll be 40 next year and have never taken a proper vacation. Extended business trips to do something fun while I’m there. Visiting friends and family. Always just long weekends (never more than 3 days total),” he wrote.
The Reddit user said he wanted to take a week-long trip to celebrate his birthday for “fun,” and that he wanted to take a seven-day trip overseas — a feasible plan for him, who’s been saving money since his early 20s, but probably not for his girlfriend.
“She doesn’t make much money and, most importantly, she has about $20,000 in credit card debt after experiencing unexpected unemployment in the past, forcing her to dip into her savings and live off her credit cards,” the Reddit user admitted.
Still, he decided to tell her he was going on a trip. Soon, the Reddit user’s girlfriend asked if she could join him, suggesting they go to Las Vegas instead of going abroad, as her financial situation made her reluctant to go on such a big trip.
“I told her I’d pay for her lodging and, depending on where we were going, I’d even help with airfare,” the boyfriend admitted, but he wasn’t planning on footing the entire cost of his and her trip.
But his generous offer wasn’t enough, given her mountain of debt: Even if she traveled domestically, she wouldn’t be able to pay for even half the airfare or meals.
“I said I understand, but I’ve been wanting to do this milestone birthday thing for a while now and I plan on going away for a week, even if it’s just by myself,” the Reddit poster confessed.
“She was upset that I was traveling without her and we got into a bit of a fight.”
His friends and family are divided on the situation, with some in his circle arguing that he should go on this trip for himself, “with or without a girlfriend.”
“On the other hand, some people say it’s cruel to plan a holiday in front of someone who is trying to pay off large amounts of debt,” he pointed out.
Other Reddit users believe he was justified in leaving his girlfriend behind.
“You have too much going on in your life to be held back by someone you barely care about. She either needs to get over her feelings of isolation or find a new, supportive partner,” one reader commented.
Another wrote: “Inviting her to go with you is fine, but the moment she realizes your plans are not financially feasible, the only acceptable next step is for her to tell you how excited she is that you can go on this trip.”
“You’ve only been dating her for 3 months and she’s already upset that you’re not paying for all of your trip for your milestone birthday next year?” another Reddit user added.