Ask chef, food stylist, chocolatier and more Varun Inamdar about the secret to his perfect marriage and he responds naturally: “A deep connection. It doesn’t have to be literal. A glance, a word, a whistle, a little nudge – that’s how we communicate now.” Their love story is no dal chawal tale and is as interesting as a fish curry. Read on.
Q. When and how did you meet your wife Tejashree?
A. Tejashree and I happened to meet during our school days. I use the word ‘knew’ intentionally because that is how it really was. My father had a group of friends and one day her father became one of that inner circle. That’s how we started meeting regularly as families, mostly during family get-togethers and parties. We found a home for each other through that.
Q. What was your initial reaction when you saw her?
A. To be honest, it wasn’t like there was a violin or piano playing in the background. We met as acquaintances and felt comfortable with each other right away. We exchanged phone numbers and that’s when the bond grew. I still remember my parents giving us our 18th birthday presents. We chatted till dawn that night. I think that’s where it all started.
What attracted you to her?
A. She is very shy but when she likes someone she becomes very talkative. I can talk to a log just like that so I think that’s what sets her apart for me. Unlike me, she is quiet. Other than that, just like me, she is kind, caring, accepting and generally calm. We are very happy together but on the same couch, doing our own thing, happy and non-interfering.
Q. Who took the initiative to get to know each other?
A. I guess it was, but we just struck the right chord with each other. Having known this shy girl for over 30 years, it’s a wonder to me how it all just fell into place. And it did! Life is Tetris, I guess.
Q. Who played the role of Cupid?
A. Family members played their part unwittingly. We had, and still do, mutual friends. Manisha is now a well-known gynaecologist. One day, I mentioned this to her casually. She gave me the conviction that this was indeed the one.
Q: What was the trigger?
A. The cell phone! And the accompanying phone company bill gave the whole story away to the family.
question. Who took the lead in deciding the dates?
A. It all started with a simple question: “Hey, how are you?”. We sent SMS during our university lectures, and gradually it evolved into “Can we meet up in the evening?”. Back then, we didn’t even have the words “date” or “proposal,” so we didn’t understand them yet. It was just a sparkling bond and respect for each other.
Q. Where did you first meet and did you give her anything, like flowers?
A. We went for a long walk. That was it. Much later, I took her to a cricket match at Wankhede, because she loved sports. She had always worshipped Sachin Tendulkar and Shah Rukh Khan. I knew them both personally, so I asked them if I could spare some time to meet them. They very kindly agreed and spent more than an hour with us. But this was not a bait or a way to impress her, because neither of us are that type. But it was something a shy girl like her had always silently wished for and I was more than happy to see it come true. No amount of flowers could have done that.
Q. Who was the first to say “I love you”?
A. Both. I think we lacked the arrogance and courage.
Q. How many years did you date before you decided to get married?
A. For about 8 years before we got married in 2009. We never even thought about marriage. We just enjoyed spending time together. One day our parents met and decided to marry us. We celebrated shyly when the date was announced. On our first trip to Egypt, we ended up buying books on ancient history as everything flew over our heads like a plane. I remember calling my friend Jackie Shroff and telling him about my upcoming marriage. He replied with one word: “Marega”. Not very helpful. Hahaha.
Q. Who has a short temper?
A. If you ask her, she will say, “He.” I agree, because my threshold for tolerance for nonsense is very low, almost zero these days.
Q: Who is more interesting out of the two?
A. I can laugh just thinking about the last joke I heard. I learned from her that humor is subjective. She can sleep listening to stand-up comedy.
Q. You cook for the world, but tell our readers what she’s making for you?
A. The best fish curry on earth. She fries fish like a pro and makes the best chapatis!
To me, love is caring.
Published Date: Sunday, June 23, 2024 8:00 AM IST