We’ve all heard the saying, “Be careful what you wish for…you might get it.” For a man who was tired of his marriage and asked his wife for an open relationship, these words couldn’t ring truer, but he will no doubt regret it for the rest of his life.
The man demanded that his wife be open about their marriage, but became furious when she started dating her boss.
In a video uploaded to a TikTok account that posts Reddit stories, the woman first reveals that she had no intention of dating anyone and that she was in a monogamous relationship that she shared with her husband before all this happened. He said he was satisfied.
The couple had been married for eight years, and she believed they had a “healthy marriage” and “a wonderful intimate life.”
She says that months before sharing her story, she was surprised when her husband pulled her aside and expressed his dissatisfaction with their love life. He was unfulfilled and outright said he needed something other than his wife to get there.
His wife was confused because they had a regular intimate relationship and he never hinted at problems in the bedroom. He then proposed an open marriage for her, which made her feel “small and unwanted.”
He claimed to love his wife and wanted to be with her, but made it clear that she could not change anything to satisfy him sexually and that it would have to be another woman. He told her it wasn’t her problem, it was his “masculinity” problem.
She reluctantly agreed to the new arrangement out of love for her husband.
They agreed to be transparent about their dating lives, and he jumped headfirst into dating his coworker.
She said the first few weeks were “excruciating” and cried herself to sleep imagining her man having fun with a “younger, more attractive woman”. It took five months of him dating her “girlfriend” before she finally decided she needed some outside company, too.
So she created a Tinder profile and, to her surprise, more than 100 men matched with her the first night she joined.
My wife thought many of them were uninteresting, but then she matched with an older man. “He seemed very successful and was a gorgeous ‘silver fox,'” she recalls. After contacting him, the two met at a bar a few days later.
“It felt so good to see romantic butterflies for the first time in almost 10 years,” the woman tweeted. That date was the beginning of a fulfilling and intimate relationship.
When she told her husband about the new relationship, he dismissed it and was not threatened at first.
He patted her on the head like a puppy, said, “Oh… that’s good, honey,” and went off to catch up with the women in his entourage. But things came to a head for her when her boyfriend asked her to bring a manila envelope to her work that he had left in her car.
He stopped by his place and she started following the instructions to get there. She was “stunned” when she ended up going to her husband’s workplace, not knowing that her new boyfriend and her husband were her colleagues.
Feeling awkward, she headed to her boyfriend’s office to deliver the documents. He thanked her and kissed her, but as she turned to leave, her husband was standing there, realizing that his wife’s new spouse happened to be his boss, and asked her to leave. He stood with his mouth in a “perfect O” shape.
Even though she had done nothing wrong, the woman felt ashamed and could see the hurt in her spouse’s eyes. She noticed him easily and hurried out of her office.
Afterwards, the husband cried at home and begged his wife to stop the affair. He calls her out for hurting him and urges her to remember that everything is his idea, not hers.
Nevertheless, he dissolved the marriage and begged her to end her relationship with her boss. But it may already be too late, as she has “real feelings” for her boyfriend and likes her current arrangement.
She describes her husband as “controlling and unfair” and is not even sure if she wants to get married and is preparing to choose between two men.
Both parties in the relationship must agree to an open relationship without resistance.
There are many reasons why one or both partners may want an open marriage. Maybe you don’t want to abide by the norms of monogamy, your partner has sexual preferences or fantasies that make you uncomfortable, or you just want to try something new.
In this case, it’s not entirely clear why the husband wanted to open up their marriage, but he claims it was for his “masculinity.” However, her husband may have already been dating another woman and wanted to remove any potential guilt for his wife’s cheating.
Unfortunately, when he asks his partner to open up the relationship, especially when one partner has his eyes on the other person and only thinks about his own satisfaction, they often think that the person is interested. I didn’t realize that I would never know that I was missing something. There are also options.
If the person you thought only had eyes for you matches your energy and others show interest in him, relationships outside of marriage probably won’t look as appealing. So if you’re trying to get into a relationship, be prepared for the consequences of your actions, especially if your partner isn’t totally into the idea from the beginning.
Similarly, open relationships usually don’t work as much as they require decisions to be made between the partners. Usually, the main relationship, the first one opened, takes precedence.
While it could be argued that the man was wrong to enter into a marriage to get a woman on his side, the wife might also be considered wrong for not prioritizing the health of her relationship with her husband.
Building an open relationship requires not only consent from both parties, but also ground rules and good communication. It’s not for everyone, so make sure it’s really what you want.
Neely Osler I’m a writer from Seattle, Washington, and the author of seven books. She covers lifestyle, entertainment, and news, as well as workplace and social issues.