A man confessed that he is unsure about the future of his marriage after learning about what happened between him and his wife while they were dating.
Posting on the subreddit r/amiwrong (an online public forum where people can find out whether they are ethically or morally wrong in a situation), he asked his wife of 20 years what happened to him. He said that his opinion of his wife changed dramatically after he confessed to her. In the early days of their relationship.
While they were dating, it was discovered that his wife was cheating on him, and the marriage was dissolved.
In his Reddit post, He explained that he and his wife first started dating in high school and had a long-distance relationship for the first two years of college. He finished his senior year of high school and then studied his year at a community college while his wife finished his first year of college.
They ended up attending the same university for a year and have been together ever since. They married the summer after college and dated for the next 20 years without incident, until his wife admitted that during the two years of their long-distance relationship, she slept with multiple men. When she found out, she filed for divorce.
“Right after Christmas, we got together with some of her college friends to catch up, have dinner, and hang out. We talked about a lot of things, but my wife We were talking about how we met in high school, and her college roommate commented, “We met in high school, had a wild few years in college, and ended up together.” It was crazy,” he wrote.
He admitted that he was “playing along” with his wife’s friend’s joke, and commented that his wife wasn’t as crazy as she was in college. Her friend then interrupted her and started talking, but she was quickly interrupted by her wife as she noticed that she was becoming very uncomfortable. He sensed something was up and revealed to his wife’s friends that they met in high school and were together throughout college.
“All of my wife’s friends went really silent and the rest of the dinner was awkward. As we were leaving, one of my wife’s other roommates pulled me aside and asked me what had happened in college and said, ‘Honestly. ‘We should talk to them,’ he continued. .
The next day, his wife came clean and said she had slept with several men during his first two years in college. She claimed that she didn’t intend for it to be a big deal because she was long distance with him and that she didn’t expect it to last because most high school couples don’t.
“When I asked for more details, she told me she had at least 10 different men, including at least three men she introduced as friends when she came over for the weekend, and one she still keeps in touch with. “I told her I wanted to do it. We’re getting a divorce and I’m going to start the paperwork as soon as possible.”
Their family and friends are pressuring him to call off the divorce.
He admitted that he has been put off quite a bit by friends and family trying to convince him that what his wife did during their relationship shouldn’t be taken too seriously. However, he stands by his beliefs and even though it was many years ago, he still hurts that he was cheated on.
“The fact that she continued to maintain relationships with men like this in front of me was an unacceptable disrespect. We have two children, and they are 17 years old and He is 19 years old and I believe he will understand why I need to dissolve the marriage,” he claimed.
In the comments section, people were quick to agree that he wasn’t at fault for wanting a divorce after being hurt by his wife’s deception.
“If you want to make the effort to keep her in your life in any capacity, that’s up to you guys. You should absolutely do what you have to do to feel comfortable with the path you’re on.” wrote a Reddit user. “She robbed you of your agency for 20 years and then invited people into your life who violated you. I don’t blame you for how you feel.”
Another user wrote, “Obviously the fact that she cheated on you multiple times is a big deal, but the real issue is the fact that the beginning of your relationship was completely fabricated. You built it on top of that. No one should criticize you,” he added. I am upset because of this revelation. ”
Discovering your partner is cheating can hurt, whether you find out at the moment or years later. Trust is a fundamental aspect of any relationship, and it’s not unreasonable for him to feel a level of betrayal towards his wife, especially since the entire beginning of their relationship wasn’t what he thought it would be.
Their situation proves that you should always be honest with your partner no matter what, even if you think your past actions will never come to light. It’s better to be honest from the beginning so the couple can work out their problems than to find out later and not have the energy to repair the relationship.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news and lifestyle writer whose work explores contemporary issues and experiences.