mother I wrote it on Mumsnet, on a British parenting forum, wonders what is a good reason to seek a divorce. She and her husband have been together for 19 years, and were married for 15 of those years. They have two children, one in high school and the other in elementary school.
The mother is dissatisfied with her marriage, but other than that it has developed into a relationship of “just two people living together and co-parenting” with no sense of romance or connection. There is no reason.”
The mother is unsure whether her unhappy marriage is a valid reason to “destroy the family.”
She explained that she and her husband had lost touch with each other both physically and emotionally, stating that they were no longer close and hardly spoke to each other. “There’s nothing there,” she said. “We don’t even argue, it’s like we just exist.”
She described the life they share. They divide the household chores well and the surface of their relationship appears to be solid. she said: “Outside, we have a nice house, go on vacations, and all the ‘normal’ things you would expect from a family.”
“My perception of divorce is usually for a great cause, but that’s not the case here and I’m completely unhappy,” she added.
The mother wanted reassurance that her dissatisfaction with the marriage was sufficient reason to end it. She expressed how lost she felt.
Torn between wanting to make changes for her own comfort and worrying that divorce would “destroy” her children’s sense of stability, she said: We realized that we had wasted years of our lives, blaming each other. ”
Divorce doesn’t always happen for some explosive reason. In some cases, married people are simply unhappy.
The plight of mothers is common. The reality is that no one deserves to stay in an unhappy relationship, even if they have children and even if their marriage appears to be working from the outside.
According to a 2017 study Pew Research Center ResearchSince 1990, the divorce rate for people over 50 has nearly doubled. The number of divorces among people belonging to the boomer generation is increasing compared to younger couples.
The increasing trend of divorce later in life is considered “gray divorce,” and the reasons behind it have to do with changing cultural expectations.
in daily health articlesDr. Susan L. Brown, co-director of the National Center for Family and Marriage Research, noted that the indicators of a successful marriage have changed dramatically compared to past decades.
She explained, “Today, a good marriage is defined by questions like, ‘Will this marriage make me happier as a person?'” “Is my marriage contributing to my self-actualization?” If the answer is no, divorce may be considered an acceptable solution. ”
Mothers seeking advice on how to overcome the possible grounds for divorce seem to be asking themselves just such questions. In our current cultural climate, being dissatisfied or unfulfilled in a relationship is reason enough to quit.
Divorce is not a smooth and simple process. Divorce is a loss in every sense of the word. However, deciding to divorce is not necessarily a bad thing, as it opens the way for people to live a more authentic life.
As for her concerns about children, growing up in a two-parent household may not necessarily be beneficial if the parents are unhappy. Staying in her failing marriage sends a clear message to her children that her happiness is not worth nurturing.
Even in the best of circumstances, maintaining a connection with your spouse requires emotional and practical effort. In our society, divorce is often framed as a failure, but in reality, divorce signifies the end of a relationship, moving from a relationship that works to one that no longer works.
Mothers have a duty to themselves and their families to prioritize the pursuit of happiness in the only life they can lead.
Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango’s news and entertainment team. She covers parenting, pop culture analysis, and all things entertainment industry.