Dear Abby
Lifestyle
Dear Abby provides counseling to women who feel their boyfriends are cheating on them because of his obsession with women on social media.
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Dear Abby: My boyfriend of two years, “Rick,” is obsessed with social media. It’s mainly the women who are there. I’m not on his social media, but he seems to act like he’s single there. When he’s not at work, he’s at home, but he’s always on the phone.
Rick pays more attention to Facebook than I do. He has over 2,000 women on FB and follows thousands on TikTok. He likes their photos, gives them “hearts” and even comments. I don’t see that as a bad thing since he is home with me and has no physical contact with them. This was our only problem the whole time we were together. When I express my feelings about it, he tells me I’m overreacting and that it’s “just social media.”
I told Rick that I felt like he was cheating on me in a way because he was focusing his attention on other women he might give me. He always seems to need attention, even if it’s innocent. It makes me feel like I’m not good enough for him and I feel like he’s not interested in me anymore and is looking for the next woman.
I feel like I have to compete with them online. His TikToks are mostly women dancing half-naked. I can literally be next to him in bed, but he would rather watch them. Other than this addiction, Rick is a great guy. Help me. — Competing in Ohio
Dear competitors: Rick may be “awesome,” but he’s also absent. He may be physically next to you, but if his attention is directed to the dancing girl on the screen, you could freeze to death, but he won’t notice. . In fact, in a sense, you are frozen because your love life is on ice. Unless Rick is going to find something he can do with you instead of feeding his addiction, you need to find a partner who is truly available.
Dear Abby: My husband has always been a rule breaker. During the coronavirus lockdown, he refused to change his daily routine. He continued to run unnecessary errands and eat lunch outside (even if it was in his car) every day. My pleas for it to stop went unheeded. I protected myself by keeping my distance.
Neither of us contracted the virus, but I cannot forgive his selfish actions. He has never apologized and I think he thinks he did nothing wrong because neither of us got sick. I would argue that it doesn’t matter.he left us both at risk. How can I get past this? — Averted in the Midwest
Dear Avoided: You and your husband are lucky. A way to get past this problem is to ask your husband in a non-confrontational way why he did what he did and whether he took into account that it might put you at risk. Then let him explain.
If his response is not as satisfying as “get over this”, realize that this is what you sign up for when you marry a “bad guy” (aka a rule breaker) and take the necessary precautions. Please make sure to take all the necessary precautions. Protect yourself in the future.
Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440 (Los Angeles, CA 90069).
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