Checking your own alcohol consumption
An expert once told me that children of alcoholics are clearly more likely to accept the bottle. That in itself is a sobering feeling. In particular, I lost my youngest brother to addiction last year. He wasn’t an alcoholic, but was Addict. Drug addiction has plagued him in varying degrees for over 20 years. And whether it’s by nature, nurture, or both, I don’t want to take any chances. I’ve never seriously considered myself to have a drinking problem, and an off switch is usually better (most of the time), but I’ve definitely hit the 14 unit limit at some point in my life. There was a time when I was drinking to excess.
The first time I had a drink was when I was probably 11 or 12, at a party in Pembrokeshire. It was a somewhat upscale hotel, so I was allowed to sample some champagne. It made me feel a little dizzy, but I didn’t touch it again until I went out with some friends in the Northeast on 15/16. I remember going to a nightclub and trying to buy a half-and-half cider, but knowing I’d be asked for ID, I mostly bought soft drinks. The next step was college, where there was a standard level of drinking, but I rarely got properly drunk.
My drinking levels probably increased with my work as a journalist. There were also many lunches and premiere parties. a lot of free drinks. There were days when I would go out to lunch and then slip into dinner without returning to the office. Often there were hard-to-read interview notes scrawled on the back of cigarette packs (yes, that actually happened). In the 1990s, meeting rooms were bars and restaurants. From West London’s trendy Conran Restaurant to Soho’s Spit Pub and Sawdust Pub, it’s not unusual to drink almost every day, and we did too.
I don’t think I felt any connection to my father’s drinking because it felt so different from working men’s clubs and life in London. However, this was not the case; both contained excessive levels of alcohol and were simply packaged differently.
There were a few times I didn’t remember going to sleep, which worried me. I remember taking the train from St Pancras station to Wellingborough in Northamptonshire after a day at work. The next thing I knew, I was at Nottingham station at 2am. That’s when I called her husband. He was not impressed, especially since we had a young toddler. I slept in a Photo-Me booth on the platform and it wasn’t my best moment.
Having kids was great, but all the parents we spent time with drank a fair amount. Even though the amount of alcohol remained the same, we had a wonderful meal with an improved quality. The fun times continued.
My dad would visit sometimes and we would laugh about the size of his drinks. I had a fairly large red wine glass, but I could only fill it to the widest part of the glass. My father laughed at these measures.
I usually tried to have at least three alcohol-free nights a week, but sometimes that was difficult because if I was making dinner, it tasted even better with wine. I’m more of a wine drinker with dinner than a night out binge, so I didn’t think it was a big deal. Plus, I’m the French exit queen – they’ve cut down on drinking a lot. As it was getting late and I was getting even more drunk, I quietly took my leave. All my friends are used to it and they never regret it, even if they feel mild FOMO at the time.
I have never done Dry January or Sober October. My birthday was in January, half term was in October, and my ex-partner and I were always away for half term. Holidays abroad to cottages in Greece, Turkey and Wales were enhanced by a few drinks. When you say it out loud, it sounds a bit like an excuse…maybe it is.