friend,
It feels unusually nostalgic. I have been told, without any argument, that I have no sense of the past. While this may be true, there are times in our daily lives when we are forced to reevaluate our worldview. A phone call from a long-ago friend and a visit to another friend’s house were enough to make me stop.
Sometimes I envy people who are able to maintain long-term relationships. Many friendships that started when you were just a single person and ended up where you are today. They share each other’s changes, victories big and small, challenges and disappointments. Through every step, they stay in touch and remain loyal and affectionate. Some of us didn’t allow it.
My parents were part of a unique clan-like group. The group of eight grew up together, lived close to each other, shared the stages of raising children, enjoyed a favorable middle years, and then shared the sorrows of their later years as they quit their jobs one after another. Every time I returned and saw them gathered together in their expected gatherings, I felt happy for them, but at the same time I felt sorry for them. No new members were invited to bring new experiences or new insights.
I believe that by not having baggage and not being part of a fixed social group, I was able to develop myself. I have no regrets, but I now have a clearer understanding of what I did and did not participate in.
Distance is a huge destroyer of relationships. It can be a tearing experience, and it can be a liberating experience. It gives us a chance to reinvent ourselves. Starting from scratch and interacting with people with different views and personalities. But that actually makes it easier to leave behind what and who.
My personal journey through my transfer and career trajectory has been the driving force behind my approach to relationships. Many people may relate to this lifestyle. Now I want to strengthen the connections I have left without being distracted by my intense work life. Most of it is from people I refuse to stay away from. I can’t thank them enough.
Friendship requires some effort. It is a conscious decision to involve someone who is starting to distance themselves from you. While this may require travel and expense, it can also be completed with a text message or a well-timed phone call.
There’s more in the back than in the front these days, so I’m going to reinforce some bridges and start some new roads. I hope to meet some of you along the way.
food
Everyone has memories of family dinners at relatives’ homes. For us, that day was Sunday “Up the Block.” One set of grandparents lived up the street from us, and the other lived just down the other block. There was a smell of food on her doorstep. This is one of her mouth-watering dishes that Mary DeMarco served us. We use inexpensive roasted and stewed beef. It also requires a bit of dexterity as it needs to be tied. No fancy butcher knots needed. All you need to do is cut the string short. Don’t be afraid. It’s not as difficult as it sounds, as you can do it as soon as you gather the ingredients. Remember “Mrs. en Place”?
- 1.5 pounds flank steak (pounded as flat as possible; your butcher may do this for you)
- Crush 4 cloves of garlic and cut into cubes
- Roast, peel and cut 2 red peppers into strips (jarred is fine too)
- 1 bowl of fresh mozzarella
- 1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
- 4-5 basil leaves, chopped *You can also use pesto instead
- 3/4 cup breadcrumbs
- 1/2 cup red wine
- 1 quart tomato puree (or your own tomato sauce from the freezer)
- Cut butcher’s twine into 3-inch strips (available at grocery stores)
- Olive oil
- Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
Place the seared steak on the counter and season generously with salt and pepper.
Spread the chopped garlic over the steak.
Slice the mozzarella cheese and place it from one end of the steak to the other.
Place the red pepper strips on top of the mozzarella.
Place the basil on top of the cheese.
Sprinkle Parmesan over the layers.
I sprinkled bread crumbs on top of the cheese.
Gently roll the stacked steaks into a cylinder (you may need to ask your sous chef to help you).
Place each piece of string under and around the cylinder and tie it securely.
Heat the olive oil in a large pot and carefully sear the steak rolls until browned, then set aside.
Add the red wine to the pot and scrape up any “grumpy stuff” from the bottom. Add that liquid to the tomato sauce.
Return the rolled steak to the pot and pour over the sauce.
Bake for 35-40 hours Minutes at 375 degrees
Remove and let cool.
Slice into circles and serve over tomato sauce with your best red wine.