I’ve been providing relationship advice to clients in the dating industry for 20 years, and in that time I’ve seen my role in the industry evolve several times. When I started my business, I was the guy teaching men how to meet women.
I was the person who was there for people who were struggling with nervousness or lack of social skills. I was the person they turned to when they didn’t know how to talk to women.
As time went on and I interviewed women about men, I realized that so many of them had a hard time understanding how men thought and felt.
Eventually, I started coaching women and helping them understand the simplicity of men and human behavior in relationships.
Many years have passed since then, and I’d like to think I’m wiser and wiser now than I was when I started. And these days, we embrace the importance of surrendering to life and what life has to offer us. You end up having unrealistic expectations.
Surrendering to life is what led me to where I am today, and learning to surrender, even when I don’t want to, is the key to my happiness.
I’m sure having my daughter come into my life made me realize that. Well, to begin with, I felt that having children was taking away the freedom I wanted.
Now, even when I’m free, I want to be with my daughter, share her love, and learn all the wonderful lessons she’s giving me.
Instead of focusing on what I thought life had taken from me, I surrendered to the path life would lead me on.
My daughter has completely changed the path of my life, but she has taken me on a path that will lead me to ultimate happiness.
It is well known where I would be now if I had not surrendered to her.
At this point in my life, I surrender 100 percent. I surrender to whatever opportunity comes my way, whoever comes my way. I understand that life takes us on the path we are meant to take.
Even if we feel like we’re on the wrong path or are convinced that our path is the right one, life will eventually give us what we deserve.
This principle is the key to love and happiness and teaches us how important it is to surrender and let go when we find that a relationship is not right for us.
Letting someone go is one of the hardest things we can do in a relationship, but learning when enough is enough is extremely important.
How many times have you tried to change a guy you dated because he just didn’t fit your idea of perfection?
How many of you have forced yourself into a relationship that didn’t feel right because the man was perfect for the fairy tale you had in your head?
Have you ever been stuck in a relationship with a man you knew wasn’t right for you?
Photo: Bela Alsic/Pexels
How many times have you said to yourself, “If I just give him time, he’ll change? If I’m nicer, he’ll love me more and never cheat on me again.”
How often do those relationships drift apart?
He still acts the same, gives you the same excuses, and the relationship feels as bad as ever.
Still, you stick with him because you’re sure your fairy tale will come true. Instead, you should resign yourself to the fact that being together will never work out.
You have to learn how to let go of the fairy tales in your head when you realize that they are not right for you.
And trying to change someone to become the person you want them to be is also a very dangerous thing to do. Just accept that they aren’t right for you, surrender to life, and move on.
It’s hard to end a relationship that doesn’t work out. You’ve invested your time and emotions into someone and you don’t want to accept that it’s time to say goodbye.
You are attached to this fairy tale in your head and cannot bear the thought of it ending. You are so convinced that he is the one that you are even prepared to ignore your strong feminine instincts.
I’ve coached a woman who was stuck in a relationship with a man who wasn’t right for her for 10 years, and I’ve coached a woman who was in a bad relationship for 10 months.
The result is always the same. These women always say: “If I had broken up with him sooner, I wouldn’t be in this mess right now. If I had ended it sooner, I wouldn’t have had to pick up so many pieces.”
Life brings you the people you need, when you need them. Some people teach us hard lessons, while others teach us better lessons. The key to love is knowing when to surrender.
The moment you learn to surrender when a relationship doesn’t work out is the moment you free yourself forever. The moment you learn to surrender to life is the moment you open yourself to happiness and find your real Prince Charming who will make your fairy tale a reality.
David Wygant I’m a dating coach who has been helping men and women transform their love lives for the past 20 years. As lead writer for Ask Men and the Huffington Post, his advice has been provided across television, newspapers, and magazines, including MTV, The New York Times, MSNBC, Fox News, Cosmopolitan, Men’s Health, and E!. Entertainment TV etc.