For some reason, my wife thinks I’m accident-prone. Whether due to a lack of attention or some cosmic game of chance, I seem to be more likely to harm myself than others in situations that should be harmless. I don’t know much about that, but I’ll tell you this. Yesterday, while cutting her daughter’s nails, a piece of nail came flying off her clippers and got stuck under her eyelid.
I enjoy cutting my daughter’s nails and painting her. She enjoys it because she enjoys it. It’s always a nice, quiet moment. We sat and chatted while holding my little hand. Scratch, punch, the job is done. It couldn’t be simpler. So yesterday when I noticed that her nails were a little long, I asked her to jump on my lap and she would cut them right away. It’s Sunday afternoon and the radio is playing. What could be more fun than this?
At this point, you need to provide strong trigger warnings. If you have an irrational fear of eyes (ophthalmophobia – save that for your next pub quiz) or are in any way nauseous about eyes or ocular problems, read on right away. We recommend that you stop.
My first mistake was taking off my glasses. I’m always a little worried about damaging my skin when cutting my nails, so I wanted to get up close and take a closer look. In retrospect, it was unnecessary to put my face close to the nail clipper. That was my second mistake. Things were going well. When I was in second hand, after the clip, I immediately felt a stinging pain in my right eye.
I immediately knew what had happened, but at first I thought, “This can’t be true.” Honestly, who wants to get their nails stuck in their eyes? The chances are so low that anyone should worry.
Panic quickly mounted. It’s unpleasant to have a foreign object in your eye, but sharp claws bring a certain fear.
My third and worst mistake was constantly blinking right after the nail hit my eye. It was a natural reaction, but the blink dragged the nail from the front of my eye, under my eyelid, and behind my eyeball. I’m not going to lie. I screamed. It was really painful. I felt the sharp edges of his nails practically scraping the soft white jelly of my eyes.
Panic quickly mounted. It’s unpleasant to have a foreign object in your eye, but sharp claws bring a certain fear. What should I do if I can’t remove it? Do I have to go to the hospital? How do doctors get it out? Do I need surgery? I feel it rub against the back of my eye, which is bad enough, but what if it twists and turns and actually sticks in my eye? What happens if I get infected? You can lose your eyes. God, I could die.
I’m not usually one for disasters like this, but these thoughts crossed my mind as I walked through the kitchen, groaning as if I’d been shot in the head. Word spread on WhatsApp and my mother-in-law gave me some good advice. When her contact lens stuck in her eye, she was told to fill her egg cup with warm water to wash it out.
That’s what I did. There was a bit of trial and error. The egg cups didn’t fit perfectly over my eyes, so my face got wet on the first try, and I just squinted at my sad reflection in the bathroom mirror. But I kept at it. I washed my eyes, one after another, to no avail. It was a very unpleasant experience, rolling my eyes in the warm water and feeling the scraping and scratching of cursed nails.
[ ‘If holidays with kids are so hard, why do we do it?’ ]
I gave up. I sat for several hours and contemplated my body. Sure, living with one eye will take some adjustment, but I think I’ll make it work. However, I was still worried that the infection might have spread to my brain.
I returned to the makeshift operating room in the bathroom for a final shot of removing the nail, and after a few rinses, I felt the nail move down towards the front of my eye. When I lifted my eyelids, I saw it running down. I grabbed a tissue, shaped it into a soft spear, and fished out the spiky threat before it disappeared again.
So all in all, it’s not a vintage day. But I learned a valuable lesson. That said, when cutting your child’s nails, keep a safe distance and always wear industrial-strength safety glasses.